If Cats were productive

instead of being lazy buggers,

They’d clean their own litter box,

and be adept with a whisk broom.

Instead of drowsing in speckled sunlight,

they’d be typing out a best seller

about finding a spiritual path

through coughing up hairballs.

Time spent draped across a lap

could be better spent

indexing numbers of spiders caught

versus spiders too high to reach,

and researching ways to climb ever higher.

Now THAT would be a noble task!

And truly, why DO cats need to sleep so much?

Couldn’t they conduct a mouse orchestra,

with sharp swift swoops of their tail?